Posted By Enitiate:

"Where does it all start?

How do we become man servants to women? A lot has to do with how we are raised.

I had the double whammy of being raised by a single mother and a narcissist.

I would guess that many of us on here were raised by a single mother? Add to that a mostly absent or uninvolved father.

My mother is a narcissist (clinical definition) and also divorced from my father for over 30 years.

She received a very generous settlement, and child support so basically she didn't have to work for 10 years.

She also received child support which she didn't have to account for.

The net result was that most of the child support was spent on her.

I worked through high school and college and paid for about half my schooling even though it was supposed to be paid for
by my parents (actually my father).

When I was first at university, I sent money to my mother. She would constantly complain about how the checks from my father were late or
the bills were too much for her to pay. She was ANGRY that she wasn't receiving more. Both my parents made me feel like I was a huge financial burden to them.

My father used to complain about the life of leisure he could enjoy if he didn't have to support me. Over and over I heard the same thing.

At one time, I got sick of it and didn't see my father for 5 years once after one of his childish rants.

My mother took expensive vacations and lived well for many years and here I was sending her money or paying my own way through school while
she spent funds that were supposed to be mine.

I didn't really make the connection until years later.

Like many of us here (I would guess) our first thought was for the women in our lives and we were hardly in the picture.

I grew up believing women were superior to men. I correctly observed that my mother had to do nothing yet my father was liable for supporting her.

I could see no obligation that my mother had to my father. He was just a wallet.

Other men she dated after my father we just wallets too. She gave little and was a master at extracting money and favors from them.

My mother was never in love with my father. She married him for his financial prospects even though he didn't have money at the time, he had a
good future. It wasn't bitterness or rewriting history on her part. That's just how it was.

I grew up thinking this was normal life. A queen surrounded by her fawning servants eager to her bidding.

At the time I didn't identify it as a queen or fawning servants but rather the normal course of things because women are good and men are obligated
to take care of them.

I noticed the same was true in other families I saw.

When I did marry, I went with my fiancee to an attorney to discuss a prenup. I was suspicious of marriage and even though I was in love considered it
a risk. The attorney pretty much laughed me out of the office and said it couldn't be done. At the time, I was young and had few assets.

I was too young to realize this was the opinion of just one man.

I did marry and later divorce after many years and it cost me big time as I had become quite successful in life.

My ex ended up well off and had the same bitter attitude that she could have received more money that is so typical of women.

She was a lot better off than she could have ever been on her own yet she wanted more. No logical reason.

It was only around the time of the divorce that I really started to piece together the true nature of women. I had been as brainwashed as the next guy denying the
reality of my senses and believing the propaganda that society puts out about women.

It's still hard for me to overcome my protective urges toward them.

My father died a couple of years ago. I told my mother about it and her first thought was whether she could collect more social security against his account.

To this day, she still complains bitterly about how little she got.

She's still after more money from my father even though he is dead. After all, she is owed more.

My recovery has been long and it's still a work in progress.

I don't think my story is unusual and I wonder how many other sleepwalking men are out there defending the selfish spoiled women in their lives.

I was one of them so I know how easy it is to find yourself in that role.

Givng to women..it's like trying to quit smoking! A bad habit that relapses.

More importantly, how can we reach them while they are still young and can enjoy the maximum benefit from it? "

A response by SuckerFree:

" My friend divorced. His young wife got two cars, house, furniture, and over 50% of his paycheck. In the 3 years since she has gone to Malta, Paris, one other I forget. She has purchased a Range Rover, and all 3 of the kids are in private school starting from the first day. He delivers subs on the weekends and donates/sells his plasma twice a week. He plays her phone messages to me where she cries and says "I'm struggling over here", "you do nothing to help me". Oh, and he is pretty much considered a dead-beat by the law. Even though he got nothing in the divorce, he was still somehow 10k in the hole from day one. Nice. It's strange watching someone become ruined just because they wanted to be a Father. "